travelingpantscg

So, I was drawing at work yesterday (I'm now at WB btw, yay!), when I just looked down, startled, and thought, "This is what I wanted it to look like."  I suddenly couldn't fathom how that had happened.  Like I don't remember when I got to the point where someone tells me their idea, then I'm able to sit down and just MAKE THAT THING.  I remember being someone who couldn't figure out how to do that, and I acknowledge being the me I am now, but where were the two bridged and when did I cross?  This whole week has kind of been like that - me thinking about the person I was when I joined this site and the person I am today.

"My career counselor at my school (which btw, I feel, MUST train its employees to dissuade bright-eyed students from having any ambitions outside of the SPECIFIC interests of the program), says to me in our FIRST meeting in more than a little condescending way when I tell him I'm interested in animation, 'Well, ya know Amanda, animation is a REALLY difficult field.  You'd have to be really dedicated.  It takes a lot of hard work and time.'  Thanks pal.  And here I'd been using a pencil to pick my nose all these years."

Aside from the questionable sentence structure, haha, this was really kind of interesting to revisit.  You've come a long way, past-me.  But I'm sharing this to emphasize: do what you effing love.  There I was, six years ago, getting a degree in something COMPLETELY different and heading down a completely different career path, but the heart wanted what the heart wanted.  And I could go around busting the balls of that poor counselor, but ya know what?  He was right.  I wasn't focusing on the thing I said I wanted to do.  I was just kind of wistfully hoping the universe would catch a glimpse of my warmest, fuzziest desires, and take a chance on me.  

So once again, thanks to everyone who found me, fav'd things, followed me due to the DD.  I super appreciate it, and it's been great hearing from new people!

WOW, first time I've ever written that!  

OMGAHD, it's June.  haha.  How.  Like I was telling my bff this morning, the first thing *I* did was check out the new menu at Souplantation, so... priorities.

Anyways, just thought I'd check in.  I've been at Sony Pictures Animation for about three weeks now, and it's FANTASTIC.  I'm living, breathing animation, going to meetings about our movie, hearing so many stories from people who've been in the industry for years, people who've been at every studio, and it's the most incredible feeling to be part of this process.  I also feel like I've been really accepted.  What's kind of surreal about my particular opportunity is that despite the fact that I'm about as green as they come to this industry, they threw me right in with our character team, which only consists of four people including myself.  I'm getting the same assignments as everyone else and having to pull my weight for the team.  It's the best feeling.  I'm getting this unheard of opportunity for someone at my level to actually have influence over aspects of the movie.  My drawings are going to modelers.  I'm affecting the looks of characters.  It's unbelievable.  And the people I'm working with are so supportive and giving so much helpful feedback.  They're true seasoned professionals and I have so much to learn from them.

I'm just grateful everyday.

Also, I'ma have to decorate my office soon, because it is so sad looking right now.  hahaha.  Ah well.

Recently I've only been turning on my comp once or twice during the work week due to my hours, so if you write me on here/comment/etc, I'll get back to you as soon as the weekend rolls around!  I'm sure most people think that's typical, but I always like speedy replies from others so I try to hold myself to the same standard!  haha.

LOVE!

So I'm kind of in the process of slooooooooowly announcing this:

I got hired at Sony Pictures Animation, and I'll be started this Wednesday!

I need to say that I'm both EXTREMELY excited and stunned.  I mean... stunned.  As in... really stunned.  To the point where I don't think I've processed it at all.  

Like, can I explain something?  

I basically never thought this could happen.

Ever.  4 years ago, I wasn't even pursuing art.  I loved it more than anything, but I'd given up on it because I didn't think I could make a living or be good enough.  Like that was my life.  Just someone who loved animation, but had written off my involvement with it.  When I finally decided to jump in, I jumped with both feet, and have basically been myopically focused ever since.  Life and holidays and birthdays would roll on around me, and I wouldn't even notice because I had a final or a project or whatever else, and I'd just live and breathe this stuff because I wanted to do this.  I wanted to work in a studio.  I wanted to work in feature animation.  I wanted to design characters and help create stories and have them reach people everywhere.  That's what I wanted.  

And it's like all of a sudden I'm ploughing along and I hit a WALL, just this MASSIVE wall, consisting of people saying, "Oh, okay, well: here you go.  You get to do those things.  We'll let you.  We WANT you to."

And that's surreal.  That's fricking surreal.  It doesn't make sense yet, and I KNOW the people who hired me, and I don't even believe it.  haha.  I'm that version of happy that's terrified of being as over the moon as I want to feel.  I've conditioned myself into a finely crafted state of being tentative about all good fortune I have.  WHICH IS LAME, AND STUPID... but true.  

I'm seriously just... so excited.  So happy.  So overwhelmed, but in a good way.  

Dunno.  Gimme a few weeks.  I'm sure some form of reality will be there then.  hahaha

Love!